How to get me into bed by talking about Harry Potter — Dating Advice by Chloe

Advice by Chloe
3 min readNov 16, 2019


So here’s a blurb from my dating app: “Harry Potter is my Homeboy, Critical Role is my God. Talk nerdy to me ;)”

Out of the hundreds of matches I get in a month, do you wanna take a quick guess at how many of them speak directly to the interests I’ve presented in my bio?

Go on, guess.

Was your guess 4? Cause it’s friggin 4!

I’ve had 4 matches who read my profile, absorbed the information, and then started a conversation with me about Critical Role or Harry Potter. Do you know how many of them I went out with? All of them except for one — but that’s because his second question was about my tits. How many did I sleep with? Dude, I’m a lady. That shit’s private… but at least one. It was alright.

The real question is, why don’t more dudes take and use the clear starters I provide them with? For the most part, it’s because they’re playing a number’s game and sending the same old copy-pasted messages or taking the other lazy route of asking how my day, week, or weekend is going… It’s going fine man. In fact, it’s the same amount of fine is was 5 minutes ago when the last guy asked me, and the one before that, and the one before that, etc…

Girls get a shit-ton of matches. An attractive girl in a large city will easily get 50 matches a day. In order to stand out, you need to talk to her about what she wants to talk about. Express an interest in her interests, ask her compelling questions, get her talking about her favorite things in the world. Girls will regularly ignore the more attractive/successful/wealthy guy for the man they develop a connection with. Your first message should be initiating that connection; it takes a little more effort, but your response rate will jump up.

And here’s the catch: you don’t need to know anything about her interests in order to talk to her about them. Let’s say you’ve never even read Harry Potter (which is un-fucking likely and frankly insulting) — you can still express an interest in it and get her into a conversation about it.

For example: “Don’t hate me, but I’ve never actually read Harry Potter. What have I been missing? I’m ready to learn from the expert.”

One of the sexiest things in the world is a guy who listens, and you’re showing off your attentiveness in the first message you send her. Trust me, it’s way more interesting than asking what she’s been up to today… and who knows, she might even let you see her patronus ;)

If you’d like one-on-one coaching you can check out my services, make an appointment, or send me a message.



Originally published at on November 16, 2019.



Advice by Chloe

Dating consultant who got her start on Reddit. I write about dating and relationships and I’m always trying to make dating easier for dudes.