She’s Just Not That Into You — Dating Advice by Chloe

A few hours ago I was trying to figure out what to write about in my blog this week. I was in my pjs (to be honest, I still am. Doctor Who tank top with Harry Potter bottoms. I am one classy motherfucker.) playing Red Dead Redemption Online with friends, and I asked the group of guys I was gaming with what they hate most about dating. The resounding answer was the ambiguity surrounding when a guy should give up and move on. It makes sense, I’ve had dozens of clients ask me when they should move on, so let’s talk about it.

Step One: Recognize when she’s just not that into you.

  • If she responds to you incredibly slowly, you are her backup. She likes someone else better, or she only remembers you when she’s bored. It’s possible for you to steal the lead from the other guy, but the likelihood of this decreases by the hour. If she’s still responding super slowly after a week, it’s not going to happen man.

Step Two: Accept that she’s just not that into you

  • There wasn’t a freak accident that led to her losing all ability to use the internet, her phone, her tablets, her computer, or access to public WiFi. If you can contact her, she could contact you if she wanted to. For whatever reason, she decided not to. No answer is your answer.

Step Three: Move on

  • Don’t confuse rumination with problem solving. If you are torturing yourself by going over your interactions with her over and over again, you are ruminating. It isn’t helpful, it isn’t healthy, and it will never lead to catharsis. Problem solve instead. Look for patterns in your interactions with women who have rejected you. It’s definitely possible that you’re unintentionally doing/saying something that’s turning them off, but be solution-focused about it.

If you’d like help with your dating profile, learning how to build chemistry with your matches, problem-solving issues you’re having, or getting a gift certificate for a friend- just hit me up.



Originally published at on December 26, 2019.



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Advice by Chloe

Dating consultant who got her start on Reddit. I write about dating and relationships and I’m always trying to make dating easier for dudes.